The Road Home

Home is a place where you were born to belong.  It’s where you grow, where you learn, where you find out who you are. Home is a springboard that launches you from a solid foundation into the air and home is also the cushion for when you don’t land on your feet. 

For Jews on every continent, home is a physical reality.  Most Jews live in the Diaspora, but no matter what, the Jewish people can always call Israel home.

For the residents of Beit T’Shuvah, home has been nothing more than a fictional construction, a fabrication of a normal life that has long been out of reach.  The actions of their past lives have caused them to forget that, as part of the Jewish People, they will always have a home.

“My grandfather lived in Palestine for 2 years after he escaped Germany in 1938,” says Josh, one of the participants slated for this trip.  Josh looks forward to this chance to reconnect with his heritage, and he sees Israel in part as a family home in addition to a homeland.

Before he occupied a bed at Beit T’Shuvah, Josh had spent time living in the bed of his 2001 Toyota Tacoma pick-up: a ragged (though still running) collection of sunburnt paint, a front bumper bent on both sides, only two out of four hubcaps, and a broken latch on the hardshell camper that gave him shelter. This summer, Josh will be able to call a much larger collectionof images home: the shimmering Kineret near the Golan Heights, the lights of city night life in Tel-Aviv, loud vendors selling perfectly crispy-on-the-outside and soft-on-the-inside green falafel, the hot sun in the Negev, the smooth yet grainy mud at the Dead Sea, and the slick Jerusalem stone worn down by millennia of Jewish feet.

Israel became the Jewish home at the end of the biblical journey of Hebrew slaves who had escaped Egypt.  Beit T’Shuvah culture emphasizes the connection between this journey to Israel and an addict’s journey to sobriety.  In the musical Freedom Song, the comparison is made directly, but through groups, individual therapy, programs, and torah study, Beit T’Shuvah instills in its residents the perspective that they themselves have escaped slavery, that when they were in their addiction, no place could feel like their own home.  Now sober, these 12 Beit T’Shuvah residents are finally able to feel at home.

The only thing in the way for each of them is their own $500 ticket to New York.  From there, Taglit-Birthright will take care of their homecoming.  You can make sure they get there by clicking here and donating to the cause.

Tel-Aviv by Night

Can My Phone Keep Me Sober?

We are living in the modern age of sobriety.  No longer does sobriety mean having to trudge an hour in the snow, Big Book in hand, to get to a meeting.  No longer must people judge their sobriety date based off of the position of Jupiter.  For our time is the time of phone apps.   Apps that tell you where meetings are, give you daily reflections, and can even offer the entire Big Book in digitized form.

With so many options out there in Appland, it is clear to me that people in recovery need a way to pick through the duds and find the app that really speaks to them.  Below is a review of some of the really awesome apps out there for sober people—Enjoy!

Days Sober

This free app is really just keeping it simple.  Consisting of nothing more than a calendar that tells you how many days you have, it performs one simple function and performs it well.

AA Big Book—Georgia Sobriety

Considering all that this app has to offer, you wouldn’t expect it to be free but the nice folks at Georgia Sobriety have made it available without charge.  On top of daily reflections and a useful sobriety calculator, this app offers the first 164 pages of the Big Book broken down by chapter.  Altogether, this app is a nifty tool to be sober on the go.

One Day At A Time

Costing $1.99, this app markets itself as “the only Big Book app with Passage Highlighting.”  One can’t deny that this feature makes it effortless for people to find daily prayers and passages that stood out to them.  They even have frequently used prayers like the Serenity Prayer and the Lord’s Prayer.  The application also offers a feature to keep your AA contacts separated in your phone, allowing for easy access to other people in recovery.  Topping it off with a sobriety counter, this app is meant to be the one stop shop for sobriety phone apps.

iPromises

Created by the famous Promises Recovery Center, this app is meant as a companion to the newly sober.  While many of its features are common in other applications, a sobriety counter and meeting directory, the thing that makes this app stand out is its trigger alerts.  The user simply enters in things that trigger them to drink or use and the app will periodically remind you of them to let you know if you are walking that dangerous line.

12 Steps Companion

Lots of the apps out there can tell you how many days sober you have.  This app calculates it to the minute.  More than just an improved sobriety calculator, this app also offers a complete Big Book and all of the numbers for local AA offices.  The only downside is the app costs $2.99.

Know of any other good ones? Tell us your favorite Sobriety App in the comments below.

My 3 Weeks in Room 100

By Andie Miller

     I feel so fortunate to have been a part of the Design Project for Beit T’Shuvah.  It’s a designer’s dream, designing a room carte blanche.  Ideas and visions were flowing—I wasn’t sure where to start.  I found myself calling on Mark Haloossim, owner of Contempo Flooring.  After going through what was needed, a commercial grade carpet that could withstand a lot of foot traffic, and rifling through carpet choices, Mark said, “I have a rather large remnant from a previous job, would you like to see it?”  That carpet remnant became the inspiration for my room.  The first week of the project was spent clearing out the existing space, wiping the slate clean.   Russell and Lance, 2 amazing Beit T’Shuvah residents, removed out all the old furniture, existing carpet, baseboard, sink ,toilet, and mirror leaving only the shower/bath unit.  Rick Brown, a contractor that I use on all my jobs, and a few of his guys came next.  They floated out the ceiling, replaced and installed a bathroom door and jam, gutted the closet, replaced electrical fixtrures, and began patching and painting the walls and ceiling.  The following week Rick and Will helped me install a new closet system, bathroom flooring, headboard, and chair rail a new door jam and door for the bathroom, a much needed addition since the existing door swung outward into the entry hallway making it impossible to enter the room if the door of the bathroom was open.  Crown and base molding in the main room followed, along with installing the new bathroom fixturesJ.  Room 100 was beginning to look like what I had envisioned.

    Now that the room was coming together, I had to think about the furnishings.  The second inspiration I had was by chance.  I was at the Santa Monica Airport Flea Market, looking around, and came upon a beautiful crystal chandelier at Mickey Goldin’s booth. He is a regular vendor selling old and new chandeliers for over 10 years at this flea market.  After telling him what I was doing at Beit T’Shuvah he gave me a huge discount, as he learned it was going to such a good cause.  From that point forward, each piece that I found for the room found me.  Every piece of furnishing was by chance, everything falling into place so smoothly as if some greater force put each furnishing in my path.

    The best part of working on this project was the people. I became closer with people I had known for years and met new people with incredible stories. An inspiring conversation that leaves one feeling fulfilled is the greatest gift anyone could ask for and I found that and so much more working on room 100.

    Although frenetic at times, the atmosphere at Beit T’Shuvah was so incredibly supportive, uplifting and caring, more so than any other place I have ever been to or worked at. One can feel the power of healing by just being amongst the people there.

    For those that live in room 100, know that this room was put together by people who care and believe in you.  I do want to thank Mark Haloossim, Contempo Flooring, for donating such beautiful and durable carpet for my room and the Women’s Lounge along with Rick Brown and Will for donating there countless hours spent helping rebuild the room.  They too are recovering addicts who have been clean for many years that wanted others to know that there is support wherever you may be. Those that reside in room 100, please know we believe you deserve a chance to rebuild your life and that the room is your haven for you to grow.  Lastly, a huge thank you to Craig Miller and Lance Wright, whose tireless help, work, and support will never go unnoticed and always be remembered.

Consistent for 14 Generations

By Jaron Zanerhaft

On Saturday, April 21, 2012, I watched His Holiness the Dalai Lama speak at the Long Beach Arena.  The lines, perhaps 10,000 people strong, stretched into the parking lot for hours, with metal detectors and heightened security allowing people in at a trickle. Neo-hippies, college professors, Vegan protestors, and everyone in between were represented at this Long Beach happening. A friend and I arrived early but still ended up waiting in line long past his supposed 1:30 start time.  When we finally entered the atrium, we found ourselves in a veritable bazaar of Tibetan wares, Himalayan incense, and general Buddhist literature including His Holiness’s published writings.

Just as we took our seats, the Dalai Lama shuffled on stage with a wide smile, took off his shoes, folded his legs beneath him on his too-large arm chair, donned a sun visor, and dove right into a childhood anecdote about riding on his mother’s shoulders and yanking her ears to steer her in the direction he wanted her to walk in.

In his notoriously goofy style, the 14^th Dalai Lama delivered a string of seemingly unrelated ideas including the family origins of Anxiety, the possibility of religious unity, secular ethics, compassion and simplicity, true richness and equality, masks, and even objectification of our fellow human beings.  Many of these ideas are not new in the world, but to hear them all put together in one speech, delivered in less than two hours—that is something novel.

I have heard ideals of peace and truth preached from religious leaders, friends, and musicians, but I find it difficult to hold everything together long enough to move forward with a coherent and consistent set of actions.  I empathize with friends during their tough times, but I find it hard to imagine that actual people occupy the other cars during rush hour.  I study hard when I see a clear path to knowledge, but I run away when I encounter confusion.  I am a characteristically tenacious and loyal friend, yet I still struggle to keep in touch with those who matter most to me if distance divides us.

I believe that it is time to heed His Holiness’s unspoken, implicit message of consistency.  There’s too much good in this world to let any event pass without imbuing some form of that goodness into it.  At least for a moment, my eyes are open, and I am grateful that I can see.

Groups of Ones

By Snacky Mild

“There can be no vulnerability without risk; there can be no community without vulnerability; there can be no peace, and ultimately no life, without community.”

-M. Scott Peck

In short, I think to be a part of a community is to be brave.  Whispering sweet nothing, fantasy dreamscapes in a game of pillow talk with your significant other is a much different thing than being open, transparent, and vulnerable to an audience.  There, in that nest of comfort, between those warm sheets of love, we feel safe: guarded against the world and its judgments.

It takes courage to let people in, to be a part of something bigger than ourselves, because there is always the chance that we might get hurt.  There is a chance we might not receive all that we think we deserve.  I know for me personally it takes a lot to let someone in; because when I do it means I care, and when I care there is the chance my feelings will be hurt.  It takes a lot of bravery to trust others.  Sometimes the hardest part is letting go of our entitlement, finding fulfillment in the success of the community; placing less value on the success of our pocket books and bank accounts.

I think truly being a part of a community is about understanding how crucially intertwined we all are.  People are very sensitive creatures, battling feelings of envy, fear, and insecurity.  It comes down to a very basic principal of taking other’s emotions into account, treating others the way we want to be treated.  No one wants to feel insufficient, but I think sometimes we can act in very insensitive ways that leave a wake of destruction behind us.

The bonds created under the umbrella of pain and struggles are near unbreakable.  When I act in a way that lets somebody understand that I acknowledge their existence, that I am hear to exist with them, not above them–these are the bonds that make a community.

Passion Meets Creativity Meets The World of Beit T’Shuvah

By Julie Soter

Beit T’Shuvah strives to imbue each of us with passion, instructing us to use our passions to help the community. Two of my passions are creating beautiful environments and interacting with people.  When I first heard about the residence re-design project, I immediately jumped at the opportunity to participate, knowing that these two passions would be ignited.

THE  ROOM

Men’s Room #219 had a pleasant view of the courtyard, and that was about it.  We demolished the room down to its bare bones and started from scratch, adding much more than a fresh coat of paint.

THE PEOPLE

Those Who Provided moral support, product donations, labor and financial contributions…Their generosity helped fund new bedding, closets, desks, chairs, an incredible wall with vibrant messages, and a functional and attractive bathroom with a pretty cool shower head.

My Brother-In-Law, the general contractor, who schlepped to Ikea, Home Depot and Beit T’Shuvah multiple times to provide his invaluable labor and expertise.

The Artist, a recovering addict who turned his passion for illegal graffiti into a lasting, legal, stunning and startling creation on a wall at Beit T’Shuvah.

The Newly Sober Young Man who I met in the hallway one day.  Still kicking, he was wearing dark sunglasses and a head covering to keep him warm.  I asked him to remove his sunglasses and I saw a beautiful soul behind the still pain-wracked body…please recover your passion and discover your purpose.

The Project Supervisor, two years sober, putting in 16-hour days, 7 days a week, overwhelmed with requests (demands???) from a bunch of perfectionistic designers, never losing his cool, always trying to accommodate everyone.

The Current Residents of Room 219, a lovely gentleman who has reconnected with his children and has been able to remain sober even through the loss of his father, who loves to journal every night before going to sleep; and the vulnerable, sweet once-a-day-cigar smoker, committed to leading a better life, wanting to catch a golf tournament on his unwieldy television during his down time.

My Son, who Beit T’Shuvah breathed life back into, slowly, one day at a time, who is approaching two years of sobriety.  He is the light of my life, and I am beyond grateful on a daily basis for the healing power of Beit T’Shuvah and the inner strength it has taken my magnificent boy to conquer his demons.

THE RESULT

Today, I am fulfilled…my passions helped create a peaceful haven for the two continually rotating men who are being given the opportunity to regain their sobriety, dignity and productiveness through Beit T’Shuvah’s incredible life-saving and life-altering program.

May the current and future residents of Room 219 continue the healing process.

Remembering the LA Riots

20 years ago today our beloved City of Angels was in chaos.  20 years ago today we were classified as a disaster zone.  20 years ago today you couldn’t look outside without seeing the smoke or hearing the broken glass and shattered screams.  Some may have already forgotten it ever happened and to others it’s simply a blurb in a history text book but the truth is that the LA Riots of 1992 were a very real event that should not be forgotten.

The scene in 1992 Los Angeles was one of heated racial tensions.  60% of the LAPD was white and minorities were facing heavy prejudices from law enforcement.  The spark that ignited the flame came after the beating of a black LA native named Rodney King.  The LAPD officers who were charged with having beaten Rodney, who gained national notoriety for what was done to him, were acquitted.   That acquittal drove the city into pandemonium.  The outcry started as a call for justice but eventually unraveled into a scene of greater depravity than had ever been seen in our country before.

Store windows were shattered, cars were attacked, fires were started, people were shot—and there was seemingly no one to stop the insanity.  The LAPD didn’t have enough man power to stem the riots and so the National Guard was finally called in.  After the initial 3 days of rioting the destruction had resulted in 55 people dead, 1,573 businesses destroyed, and a total cost of $1 billion dollars.   Two of the most memorable scenes from the LA riots were the assault and beating of Reginald Denny, a trucker who was just driving through the city, and the murder of an unarmed minority school girl named Latasha Harlins.  The thing that was most striking about the LA riots was that, due to video technology, the scenes of destruction and chaos were televised as never before.

In this year, the 20^th anniversary of the riots, Rodney King has published his book, The Riot Within, to give his view on LA riots and the mind-set that led to them.

One of the promises of AA says that, “We shall not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door on it.”  This means that sometimes things must be learned the hard way and if we do make a mistake we should learn from it and do our best to never repeat it.  If we were to shut the door on our past, we might let it fade into obscurity.  By forgetting how horrible our mistakes were, we might lose the strength to continue on in sobriety.

The LA riots were a horrific tragedy in the history of Los Angeles.  The only way we can make sure that they never happen again is to honor those who were victims during the riots and to constantly be improving ourselves.

What do you remember about the LA Riots?  Share your thoughts in the comments below.

LA Marathon – The Finish Line: Part 4/4

By Jaron Zanerhaft

“Last year, I flashed this badge and they let me through the police line.  I parked just two blocks away,” John Sullivan says with a sly grin.   As we slow down to take our exit ramp, John and I practice showing our press passes to imaginary parking guards, pulling the lanyards with cocky conviction and cool self-validation.

It didn’t work.  The police line this year had been pushed back two blocks, leaving the VIP street parking from last year open to the public.  We had to wait for someone to leave, just to get a spot in a parking garage.

Turning a corner out of the garage, the sharp wind turned on like a switch, immediately asking more of us in each step.

We arrived at the gate where media could enter the finish line area, and, flashing our badges just like we had practiced, the guards parted the metal barricades and let us walk through the line.  As soon as we breached the gate, we were bombarded with runners, family supporters, volunteers, and gust after gust of windswept foil anti-hypothermia blankets.

Once we were within the vicinity, the four of us—John, Erin, Lauren, and I—made our way to the actual finish line.  More security demanded our press identification as we climbed up less-than-sturdy metal stairs to a perch looming over the runners as they took their final strides.

So many runners threw their arms up as they crossed the threshold from the battalion of runners into the civilian support mob.  Some raised their hands above their head with open palms, as if surrendering at last to their exhaustion.  But others raised clenched fists, as if to claim victory over the road that had over the last 6 or 7 hours tried to defeat them.

I never imagined my overtime work would have me gazing from a platform above a set of digital clocks presenting finishing times— literally, working over time.

The slick canvas banner doubled over itself by the wind over its single steel-bar skeleton, its incessant whipbang against the frame supporting clocks beneath.  As another banner spread over the platform’s front started to pick up more and more wind, two men in matching solid-colored polo shirts rushed up the metal stairs to the platform so they could take down the would-be sail.

Finally, when Gini, John’s wife, crossed the finish line, we started to pack up our gear and head out.  Somehow, I made it home, collapsed on my bed, and slept until nightfall. I felt like I had run the marathon myself.  Next year, maybe I actually will.

 

2nd Mini Reveal: An Experiment In The Art Of Zen

We’ve hit another milestone in the journey that is Beit T’Shuvah’s Charity Design Project.  This past Sunday, a lot of words got thrown around—words like “thank you,” “I’m so happy,” and “this is amazing” came pouring from the lips of the astonished residents.  But the main word that could be taken from the day was “Zen.”  So many of the designers stated how they “were going for a feeling of Zen and tranquility,” and it’s safe to say they hit the nail on the head.

After weeks of hard work, it was a joyful and somewhat chaotic day.  Hoards of people crowded in Beit T’Shuvah’s hallways, all hoping to get the first glimpse at one of the rooms.  However, Heidi Bendetson and Rhonda Snyder, the two women coordinating the Charity Design Project, kept it all in order.  The most important thing was that the first people inside each room were the designers and the residents.

Below is a small sampling of pictures from the 2^nd Charity Design Mini Reveal.

 

Zen Graffiti in Room 219

The Resident, The Painter, and The Designer

The 3 Designers: Anat, Christina, and Debra with a grateful resident

The newly-designed room 215

The resident of room 219 sits for a picture with his designer and Heidi and Rhonda

The 'Charlie's Angels' Designers of room 108--Shelly, Debra, and Madeline

The Tiffany Blue serenity of room 108

Room 211 offers a little piece of paradise.

For all of the photos from Sunday’s event, please visit Beit T’Shuvah’s Flickr page, and for before photos of all the rooms please visit the Designed From The Heart Facebook page.

Tell us what you thought about the rooms in the comments below.

Schedule for 2nd Design Project Mini Reveal

The excitement is building as the week progresses toward the Mini Reveal on Sunday!  We can’t wait to see the design creations.  Once again, we want all the designers to know how much we appreciate their effort, time and big hearts.  There will only be 15 minutes between viewing the rooms so to all in attendance, please be ready so we can move smoothly through the process.  Here is the schedule for Sunday April 15, 2012……….

Mens-

1:00 – Room # 211

1:15 – Room # 215

1:30 – Room # 217

1:45 – Room # 219

Women’s-

2:00 – Room # 108

2:15 – Room # 110

2:30 – Room # 114

If you can’t make it do this Mini Reveal, don’t worry.  The Grand Reveal Open House will be taking place July 12, 2012 where all will be welcome to come and see the rooms!